It's About Life; an introduction

I decided that I wanted to start keeping all my fitness stuff in one place, so here's a blog.  Yeah, another fitness blog, like the internet isn't chockablock full of them already.  But my goal with this blog isn't readers (although I will welcome you with open arms), it's merely to have a cohesive, linear, easy to access place to track my health journey.

I say health journey, not weight loss, for two reasons.

1. I think that unless you're dealing with extremes (over or under) the scale can be very misleading and isn't an accurate gauge of health.  I've never been overweight, I've been under (see below), but for the most part I've always been within accepted ideas of a healthy BMI.

2. I have personally battled an eating disorder in the past (which I lied to myself about for years) and obsessively working out in over abundance wanting my weight to be 115 tops....  So the scale is my enemy.  I'm only weighted at the Drs., and even then if I'm feeling weak, I'll look away and tell the nurse not to tell me.

A little background, just a little, I'll only go back a couple of years for now to keep this simple, but to give some perspective for anyone that may actually be interested in following this blog.

In May of 2012 I decided I was dedicated to losing the last of the baby weight I'd been carrying around since 2008.  I started hitting the elliptical machine like a mad woman (yeah, I use to be a cardio bunny).  Little did I know that I was messing up my knees.  The pain started, and it continued off and on until, well, now.  I had no insurance, no way of really seeking an answer, so I just dealt with the pain.

I had days I couldn't walk.  Just going to the bathroom was a chore.  I had to plan out my day to minimize walking.  My son would miss school because I couldn't walk him to the bus.  I felt like a failure.  Depression set in and my body weakened.

Flash forward to Oct of 2013, a dear friend of mine began her fitness journey (I'll get back to that another post).  Watching her inspired me to dig deep.  I was sick of feeling weak.  I was tired of feeling tired.  I was done feeling betrayed by my own body.  I made a decision that if my knees wouldn't let me use them, fine, I would work the parts of my body that would allow me to.

I began lifting, focusing on my upper body almost entirely.  I would occasionally work my legs, but my knees rarely allowed that.  My arms responded quickly.  It was liberating.

Oct 2013

On top of hitting the gym I also had to be very careful about my food intake.  Not being very mobile means having to cut calories to counterbalance the lack of activity.  So I began looking for more healthy alternatives.  And I will get more into detail about those things in other posts too, no worries, I will share.

So, we're going to flash forward another year to this past Oct.  I FINALLY have insurance.  I went to the Dr., gripping that precious card, paid my $15 and saw a Dr. for the first time in years.  She diagnosed me with Patellofemoral Pain Syndrome and Prepatellar Bursitis.  The cause yet unknown, but it was a start.  So my next stop was the Physical Therapist.  I was so excited.  Anyone that has lived with chronic pain can tell you that answers are a godsend.  So she then diagnosis me with Patellar Tracking Disorder.  In layman's terms my knees are shifting when I walk causing them to rotate off track, rubbing and grinding happening, not supposed to do that.  Ouchie.

Since then I've begun PT workouts, simple exercises meant to strengthen my leg muscles to help support my knees and assist in correcting the PTD.  So far things are going well, and the proof is in the pictures.

Spring of 2009 - Sept 2014

July of 2014 - Dec 2014

Sept 2014

Nov 2014

 

Nov 2014

July 2014 - Dec 2014

I've learned a lot of things over the last year.

I've learned that cardio is not as effective as weight lifting when it comes to shaping your body.  And on that note, no two bodies are exactly alike, so don't compare yourself to others, compare yourself to your past and you'll get a much healthier idea of what will work for you.

Weights will not make you bulky and huge.  You have to BULK to be bulky, and some folks do do that, and that's fine, but it's not the norm and weight lifting alone won't make you huge or "manly."

You can lose "weight" ... well, you can lose FAT (which for some translates into weight) just lifting.  I have done zero cardio in the traditional sense.  No treadmill, no elliptical, no bike.  But I do work up a good sweat and get my heart going with just weights.

I'm not afraid of things taking time.  I know that so long as I keep going and don't stop eventually I will reach my goals.  Yes, there are other people lapping me, but they don't have the issues I have, so I can not compare myself to them.  It may seem like months go by and nothing has changed, but then I'll compare a photograph and what do you know, things HAVE changed.  Even subtle changes are still progress.

This is a lifestyle, this is not a diet or a hit the gym just to lose a little weight type of thing.  My results, now and in the future, are dependent on creating a lifestyle that I can maintain so I must be comfortable with it and it must work with the rest of my life.

I've learned that a network of support is priceless.  Instagram has been invaluable to me.

And last but not least, I've learned that it's just as important to love your body from beginning to end.  To focus on what it can do, not on what it can't.  To be proud of it.  To see it's beauty through every step of your journey because that journey should be about creating a healthier you.  It should never be about losing weight to conform to society's ridiculous standards.  To looks like a model or fit into a size 0.  It should be about living a long healthy life, breathing easier, keeping up with your kids, or dogs, or whomever you have that runs around you in circles.

It's about finding inner peace and happiness.  It's about life.